Battlemouth

(Before I begin, I’ll note that this is all opinion on my part and doesn’t reflect the views of the rest of the moviegoing public or other fans of the source for that matter. With that said, I strongly recommend reading the book before going to see the movie.)

It’s been called “the most celebrated graphic novel to date,” which is a fair assessment. Comic book writer Alan Moore (From Hell, League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, V for Vendetta) is known for his writing prose and Watchmen is certainly no exception to the rule. Ironic that he’ll want nothing to do with film adaptations of his work, and yet a few of his more popular, mainstream creations have all been adapted (inaccurately) to the silver screen. Moore himself strays away from film to show that the comic book medium can offer possibilities that other mediums, such as the likes of film, can not.

It’s only after you read Watchmen that you begin to realize, “Oh shit, Moore’s right on the money. There’s no way you can make a movie out of this.” With Watchmen, there was a certain set of expectation to be met, as the movies been in pre-production hell for years. It’s not the kind of story that makes for a movie. Zach Snyder (Dawn of the Dead, 300) was contacted to direct for the umpteenth go-around. His goal: To make this stay as true to the source material as possible. Myself, having seen and read Frank Miller’s 300 (a case where I didn’t care for either comic or movie), knew he was at least capable of emulating scenes directly taken from the source. However, Snyder’s gimmicky action scenes are his trademark and anyone who’s read it knows that Watchmen anything but action-packed. Watchmen does not deserve the popcorn, Summer movie treatment; It’s not some mindless testosterone induced romp (*cough*300*cough*), so I knew this couldn’t bode well. Not to mention the story itself doesn’t lend itself well to the average movie-going audience.

Review (SPOILERS AHEAD! If you have not read Watchmen, do not continue!)

Going into Watchmen, my expectations were low, and my mindset was critical. Snyder wanted to remain as close as he could to the book. Also going in, I knew from various interviews that they were going to ditch the squid (a key element to the book’s ending), but the “idea would remain the same.” So how close to the source could he possibly come?

The film opens with The Comedian getting his ass handed to him, but putting up a hell of a fight as well. The transition from book to movie was fair, given that scenes would have to be elaborated to work on screen. After Blake’s death has been established, we’re treated to a wonderful opening credit sequence showcasing the Minutemen, and the later costumed adventurers. What’s so brilliant about the credits is that it contains the tone of Watchmen with taking a few creative liberties that are nods to the changing times leading up to the alternate 1985 setting (while a lengthened Bob Dylan’s “The Times They Are A-Changin’” is playing, no less).

From there, the film delivers a visual journey throughout the graphic novel. For the most part, every scene is portrayed accurately. A good chunk of this can be attributed to the actors – Jackie Earle Haley (Rorschach) and Jeffrey Dean Morgan (Comedian) definitely being the real stars of the picture. Billy Crudup (Dr. Manhattan) and Patrick Wilson (Nite Owl II) were believable and did a pretty good job. The only real problem I had with casting was Malin Ackerman as Laurie. I didn’t buy it. Zach Snyder’s signature slow-motion didn’t bother me as much as I thought it would; the overblown action overshadowed that. A very noticeable scene is when Dan and Laurie are on their way to visit Hollis and have a run-in with some top-knots in the alleyway. The first thing that happens is Dan snapping one’s arm in two, resulting in a hemorrhage of blood at the audience. An extreme departure from the rest of the movie somber and bleak mood, though I suppose you have to keep the audience happy. Along a similar vein, there’s a lot of sex. Most notably in Archie, when Dan and Laurie have a SLOW-MOTION sex scene set to Leonard Cohen’s “Hallelujiah.” For like 2 minutes. Which partly due to the music seemed incredibly forced. Actually most of the music used in the movie, while referenced in the book, is just awkward and out of place. It either breaks the mood of what’s going on or feels too cheesy for the moment. “99 Red Balloons”, “Flight of the Valkyries”, and “Sound of Silence” come to mind. Little to nothing is subtle in this movie.

Well, almost. Despite the changes made to suit a theatergoing crowd, the film really was catered to the fans. From Hollis’s garage sign to the Gunga Diner elephant balloon floating above the skyline to the graffiti all over the streets, we’re treated to a million little bits of fanservice. Blink and you might miss some cool details. Not to mention that most of the script was directly ripped from the source itself, making it a familiar, yet nearly new experience. A positive factor is seeing familiar events play out before your very eyes. However, since this is a movie, everything obviously can’t be included. Some of the details that are omitted are Tales of the Black Freighter (which I hear will be included in the extended cut), Hollis’s death and repercussions thereof, the side stories of Malcolm, Joey, and Bernie at the newspaper stand (though he does make an appearance towards the end), and Nelson being present at the first meeting of the ‘Crimebusters’ (they are instead called ‘Watchmen’ in the movie, which they are never referred to as such in the book.). Some scenes are omitted for what seems to be pacing, such as Dan’s hoverbikes or Rorschach retrieving his spare mask (which they fix by having him recover it during the riot). The movie focuses more on the impending doom at hand and the central characters that focus around that. But what’s happening to the side characters and the common man is just as important, and it’s a real shame the movie didn’t have time for that. This is a perfect example why you can not make a successful movie out of Watchmen.

And speaking of unsuccessful, here is my humble opinion about the ending: I flat out didn’t like it. We didn’t get the squid – instead we get multiple bombs of Dr. Manhattan’s tachyon energy that are detonated in several major cities at once. Killing millions, Adrian succeeds his plan of world peace moments later when Nixon appears on his many television sets (Ozy’s other “ultimate weapon”) to declare a mutual peace agreement due to the threat of Dr. Manhattan. I didn’t buy it. If Manhattan has knowingly left Earth, and the world leaders were so certain that he was the culprit (tachyon particles!), I suppose they would be fast acting to produce a mutual agreement for peace to uh, I guess unite against Manhattan. Or not. I think having an alien attack would be much more plausible to produce a fast-acting peace agreement, but that’s just me. Besides, if something like Jon can exist, what’s so ridiculous about space aliens? Also regarding the ending, Jon meeting with Adrian at the end never happens – Jon bids Laurie goodbye before he goes off to another galaxy to “create some life.” The “nothing ever ends” blurb is given to Laurie and her mother. In the novel, this establishes that Adrian had some uncertainty at the end, even after his plan came to fruition. Granted, it’s still well established how alone he is even at the end, but it still doesn’t have the same impact.

Verdict
You can call Watchmen a movie because it’s a series of events that unfolds within a limited time period, however it still doesn’t work. As a film, it feels rushed, simply because you need all these side-stories to get the full picture. I suppose changing the ending fixes that, but you can’t stay true to the source and stray that far away from it. All in all, I enjoyed watching it. It was fun to see panels straight from the comic get fleshed out on screen and seeing life breathed into a few of these characters like nothing before. The details put into the sets and backgrounds were worth it, as were some of the stellar performances. Reading the comic before going in definitely helps you appreciate it. But it still suffers from Zach Snyder syndrome – much of it feels like a music video with dialogue. But that’s just the way he does things. It was a valiant attempt.
It’s probably the closest thing Hollywood could ever come to Watchmen, and if anything I’m thankful that the movie’s release will make more people go out there and read the graphic novel.
Despite all of its short comings I could probably rate it a 7 or 8 out of 10, though I think I’d have to watch it a second time. Which I would be more than happy doing. : ) –AK